the deep end
by Val-Creative
Summary: (Extended scene for IT 2019.) After asking if they will all be friends after growing up, Stanley reveals his fears and doubts with the blood-oath. The rest of the Losers witness the emotional fallout.


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"C'mon, Stan… you don't have to be so… _sad_," Beverly murmurs. Her voice reverberates through the Clubhouse. Through all of the sun-gilded dust and hollow spaces, and through Stanley who only looks down, his face tightening up.

She playfully tugs on his green, floral shower-cap.

"Yeah," Bill declares, smiling close-lipped. His hand rests beside Stanley's knee. "We're always g-g-gonna be friends."

"What if we forget each other?"

_"No way!"_ Ben says, smiling widely at Stanley. The other boy continues to look at his own feet grimly.

Richie huffs behind them, swinging on the hammock. "I wish I could forget you nerds," he mutters, flapping open his comic book again. Eddie, right across from him, knocks his socked foot into Richie's cheek, swearing as Richie furiously wrestles him away.

"I'll never forget you guys." Mike turns around, hands clasping the rope-swing. He beams. "No matter what."

"You're _ad~or~able_," Richie says, pretending to coo. He yelps, getting another Eddie-foot instead crammed against his mouth.

Stanley's lips quiver. "I don't wanna do it again…"

"Do what?" Bill asks, concerned.

"Fight IT again." They all watch as Stanley's eyes glisten hot with tears. "I know we did the oath… _I know_ I said I would, _but_…"

"We're not gonna do it alone, Stanny," Beverly points out. "We have each other."

"We'll lose." At this, she pales and brings her cigarette back up to her lips, wiping over her own eyes. Stanley gazes up at all of his friends, incredulous. His chest heaving up and down for air. "We're all gonna die if try—_we'll die_. Can't you see that?"

"Jesus—" Eddie murmurs, rocking out of the hammock as Stanley bursts into tears, hyperventilating. It's eerily similar to how they found him in the sewers after IT latched its teeth into Stanley's face, draining his life out of him. He's lived through _just as much_ as them, but rarely wanted to discuss it. Stanley chooses to bury up everything inside until it spills out uncontrollably.

_"We're gonna DIE—!"_

"Stanley, hey," Ben whispers, reaching out to comfort him. Stanley flinches away, crying more quietly, ripping off his shower-cap.

Nobody knows what to do until Richie takes a deep breath and abandons his comic book. This is the most serious they've ever seen Richie act—next to when Bill punched him in the face over Georgie. Richie leaves the hammock, walking over and kneeling down in front of him. Not touching Stanley. Not blocking his airspace. "Count to ten," Richie tells him. "You can do it."

"_No_," Stanley whines loudly, his eyes gleaming with tears and bloodshot.

"Count down from ten, Stan."

After a moment, Stanley does it, reciting numbers with his eyes shut. He clenches his fists, tensing the muscles, and relaxing.

"Now do your toes."

Stanley does, clenching his toes and pressing his heels to the ground. He squeezes tightly for a few breathes, releasing. He flexes his feet in, pointing his toes up. Holding, releasing. Bill and Beverly exchange a wide-eyed, silent look.

"Legs."

They watch on in amazement as Richie names off body parts, and Stanley focuses, clenching, releasing, no longer gasping.

Like they've done this before. _Many_ times before.

Stanley's hazel eyes open, landing on a smiling Richie without his glasses. He kneels up when Stanley throws his arms around him, crying breathlessly, dropping his face into Richie's shoulder.

Beverly and Mike rush over, hugging them, followed by Eddie and Bill and Ben.

Stanley doesn't have to go through this _alone_.

None of them do.

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_IT (2019) isn't mine. Requested by Boyfromdistrict.3 (AO3): "a fic or extension to the clubhouse scene (when stan asks about them being friends in the future) where stan opens up a little more about his feelings about the whole IT situation and the oath and kind of accidentally gives a little too much info about his sad boy thoughts and the losers realize how effected he still is by the whole thing and kind of acknowledge his mental health and like try to be good supportive friends." It didn't get to be long but honestly it's a fantastic prompt and I'm glad you let me try it out. I wish that Stanley had gotten more for his mental health._


End file.
